Forgot today's #dropselfie for dysautonomia!

It's still October, so shout out to my Spoonies with dysautonomia!

Today I had a rough go of it at temp work, so I took a #dropselfie! 3 cheers for vanity after an attack of Neurocardiogenic Syncope! ;)

My head feels stuffed full of cotton wool for a few solid hours after an episode. Yay for random gravity checks on an otherwise run-of-the-mill Tuesday. ;) #dropfordysautonomia

Just a jolly jaunt to the quickie mart

It's been almost 10 months and I just ran a quick trip!

Say what?!

Ok, maybe it wasn't really quick. And it happened a little over an hour ago. 

I mean, nothing in the past year and a half has been quick anymore due to my physical limits... But Charlie Majors and I just loaded up in the car and went. I had my keys tethered to my wallet with D links, and we stopped at the local dinky grocery 5 minutes from our place.

 On the HUGE plus side, it was 30 minutes to store closing, and the handicapped parking spot was, no joke, a little less than 17 feet to the inside of the store. (Why yes, I did count the steps! Haha)

I hooked Charlie's harness up to the wallet mess and we walked in as fast as I could muster. I think he knew how I was feeling, because he did amazingly. No balking or anticipating commands before they're ordered. We got oriented to the department I needed, and we "Left!", "Yes! Right!", "okay, let's go!"ed our way to and from that department all the way to the checkout counter. I loaded our 4 items on the belt and he obeyed hand signals while I talked and it looked like I wasn't paying him attention!!! (I could have burst with pride!)

I had a pamphlet in the wallet and I paid, casually leaving behind the info. The only question I got from any of the staff was "Aww! How long has he been training? Have you heard of 'hand-in-paw'?" (They train therapy animals to visit hospital patients.) 

I faced this chore with grim determination, pretty sure I would encounter an uneducated manager that didn't want us visiting (because we are in the boonies) and was really pleasantly surprised by the casual perfessional attitude of the employees, and the amazing parking spot. (I can't talk about the parking spot enough, but imagine it: I pulled in, opened the door, and the ramp was parallel to my side of the car. Up the gentle slope, the doors slid open and groceries awaited! It was SUCH a welcome break energy wise!!!!)

Charlie got lots of love and 3 training treats. When we got home, he brought the grocery sack in and stayed with me until my heart slowed back down from an almost syncope spell.

Mama's good, hardworking boy, and yours truly.

And the pound said this dog doesn't like toys!

He made a pillow for himself after playing!

When we adopted Charlie, it was Christmas Eve. His first family dropped him off just before halloween. His adoption papers showed a temperament test, and it said he didn't like toys. I guess that just goes to prove that he was really scared and depressed at the pound. He's a very sensitive boy. One dirty look or harsh tone from me can result in a total shut down on his part.

If you know anyone considering adopting, tell them they will be saving a life. Charlie has always been a rare find, as you can't take just any dog and train them into service. That being said, if he wasn't fed well, loved much, and trained with consistency, he wouldn't have blossomed as much this year as he has. His first family gave him up, and he was scared, thinking the pound was his life from then on. He didn't understand what he did to end up there. (He didn't do anything!) Ever since our mutual liberation, it's been constant training and play, mixed with sleeping. 

He was food aggressive, never knowing when or what his next meal would be. He would snap at the cats or us if we neared him while eating. With constant work, he now trusts us all to feed him well, and on time. He knows hard work earns extra love and cookie treats. He knows if the cats take kibble, he will get extra kibble and they will be kicked out of the food area. Now if I out my hand in his bowl, he sits down and waits for me to move!

He was scared of car rides, always thinking we were going to drop him off forever. We always worked hard to encourage him to get in to the car on his own. At first it could easily take an hour to load him up! But we all agreed he needed to choose on his own and not be forced in because I can't physically correct or control him, it has to be psychological. So we'd load up kibble and toys and have one of us on one side, waiting and offering petting, and the other would urge and pet any time he made a move toward the car. It was exhausting, but now just the word "car!" launches him in, and he then circles in the seat before sitting.

He has changed so much, and so quickly that it's weird for me, thinking back.

Charlie, the week of Christmas 2013, right after our liberation.

Today, confident and healthy, happy to do laundry and just be a pack.

I can take him outside off leash to do his business, and he will return from 4 feet away. He knows when he's on duty his focus needs to be completely on me, and he doesn't wander off. He has just surprised me in so many ways - not just his physical transformations either! My sweet boy. I'm just so lucky his first family didn't love him enough. He is such a constant support to me now.

He's grown more than the almost 30 lbs. he put on since Christmas Day. He's grown into a dog almost ready for the public access test. ....but he doesn't like toys. ;)

I got my eye on you!

Charlie went with my dad and mom to their doctor appointment today! It was a success. They allowed the doctor to pet him, and the doctor said he was glad I have Charlie, and that I'm seeing specialists. That makes me feel 10 shades of validated, because I left that doctor in search of a second opinion and further diagnosis.

I had a very rough night last night, but I finally got a solid 8 hours of sleep, my husband is keeping a close eye on me, and I'm feeling a little better. Major depressive disorder is no joke - it's a beast. Getting enough sleep, managing stress, eating and drinking well and taking every dose of prescribed medication faithfully helps to disable the MDD beast. Last night it was roaring so loudly I couldn't hear myself think. Today, it's shivering in the corner, rocking back and forth while whispering to itself.

Be gentle with yourselves. Take your medications. Eat well. Read/craft/sing. Do healthful things, non destructive ones. Reach out to people when you feel like closing in on yourself.

Canine-toys-r-us

Shout out to my parents for the influx of toys!

Steve and I got Charlie the snoopy and a doll, and they got him all the others. I feel rich, having so many backup toys in Charley's supply closet!!!!! Organized, prepped for famine or feast, and rich.

I hope you get a kick out of the pictures of him going crazy over some of his new toys. He is still totally in love with the little black ball A&W gave him with his Halloween costume. (Thank you again!!!)

Jacks, the final update

I went in this evening with pamphlets and spoke with one of the managers, Ms. Gloria. She was very concerned at what happened, and super apologetic.

I took great comfort from our conversation! I feel confident after meeting with her tonight, that all future visits will go smoothly. She said she was gong to meet with the other manager, and they would have a talk with the staff, with the papers I brought in, to educate them about disabled people's rights concerning service animals.

I went in with the hope that things could be fixed, and I'm really relieved at the outcome. I shook hands with her, and ordered dinner! The staff member behind the counter said "I know you! You've come through our drive through with your dog!", and Ms. Gloria handed her a pamphlet and said "she is going to come in with him any time she wants to with him, alright? This is his picture. He's a working dog.", which made me feel like she really heard what I came to talk about with her. After meeting with her, I feel assured that no other service animal teams will have to go through what happened yesterday at that store. Such a relief!

I'm really tired now. I had to get out in the rain, walk around the car with my cane, unload my walker, and navigate a step while holding the umbrella and using the walker. My hip has been really problematic today, and I was really nervous that the outcome would be different. After all the activity from yesterday, I just want to hibernate. It's a good thing I only have 9 more days as a temp. I'm worn.

Time to rest between a snuggly cat and my 4 legged nurse's aide. ;)

Goodnight, dear Spoonies. The rain is no joke through the south right now. Be gentle with yourselves! (The barometric pressure really messes with my pain levels!)

Update on Jack's

So ... My momma reads the blog. She went to

Jacks this afternoon and spoke with the manager.

The manager was really upset that someone asked me and Charlie to leave. She said if we ever are treated in a way that makes us feel inferior again, to demand to see the manager in charge, and also that employees wearing red had no right to say what she said. The manager said the red shirts are regular employees and have to defer to a manager for things like requesting patrons to leave, and that Charlie and I were more than welcome to return.

Mom asked for the number for someone higher than the manager, which they graciously gave her. I'm not sure if I want to call them though. I know I need to face it and go tomorrow to talk to the manager myself, but I do feel a little better.

It just really embarrassed me for that employee to raise her voice and call everyone's attention to us like that, when Charlie was being awesome and super helpful. It's not like he was hiking a leg to mark or something. It also embarrassed me because it smacked of being told society didn't want us to be seen, like I could just go through the drive through rather than sit down at a table like a normal person. Charlie has been in more highbrow restaurants, so I thought eating fast food would be totally okay.

It's reassuring to know my parents still have my back, and a little disconcerting to know my mom can read past written word to see how it knocked me for a loop. I mean, Charlie and I have been asked to leave two other places, but each time it was because he's in training, and the proprietor said "please do come back when he's fully trained". It was requested quietly, and I didn't feel deminished or maligned, just that the managers didn't want to risk anything happening on their propery if Charlie didn't act appropriately. Totally understandable. They don't know us, and they do have that right while he's not passed the access test. But the woman today raised her voice and hand from across the diner and ..it just shouldn't have happened the way it did.

Anyway, I just didn't want to smear Jacks or the franchise because of what turns out to be one employee who is just scared of dogs. I plan on going back tomorrow like I posted before, just to make sure that the people who work there know the limits for working teams, that they can't ask someone what their disability is, but they are legally allowed to ask "is that a service animal?" And how the animal mitigates the disability. In situations where I'm not being so open about my health to strangers, I usually tell them that Charlie helps with my balance issues and retrieves items/carries items I need him to. Which is true, and doesn't violate hippa like level of medical knowledge. 

So I guess after work I'm going to go and try again at jacks. Cross your fingers!